A Method for Recognizing Narcissists

 

By: Life Coach, Frankie Martinez, July, 01, 2023,

Many of the articles I read when I initially started researching cluster b personality disorders to understand the trauma I had as a child and as an adult focused on victimization: "If only you had never interacted with a narcissist in the first place, you would not have been harmed. The narcissist would not have chosen you as a target if you had simply learnt your boundaries.

In order to shift blame away from abusers through this narrative, many so-called experts—or even psychologists—are narcissists themselves. Victim blaming is a narcissist abuse method.

They downplay (gaslight) the fact that narcissists frequently mistreat helpless people without their consent. The narcissist may have raped you or may have even been your parent. They might even be your boss or a politician.

They mistreat children, people with mental disabilities, and animals. In their unrelenting quest for dominance and grandiosity, they oppress entire communities by making them the scapegoat, using racism, sexism, and homophobia and transphobia.

The narrative of victimization also downplays the fact that narcissists conceal their true selves and manipulate. They don't promote their services. They frequently give off the impression of being exceedingly kind and loving, especially the covert or vulnerable sorts.

However, because I am borderline, I was willing to place blame on myself and, as I did when I was younger, I made an effort to make up for the mistakes that I was informed were my fault.

So, in order to avoid them, I had to learn how to recognize even the most cunning narcissist.

And I discovered them.

My tried and true narcissist screening test consists of two questions that never fail me.

One of them can respond; the other cannot.

THE QUESTION THEY ARE UNABLE TO ANSWER:

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?

The narcissist thrives by living in a fantasy world and masking his or her true nature.

They must repress all of their feelings when they deny their true selves.

Their suppressed baseline emotions are all negative: despair, anguish, insecurity, jealously, rage, and revenge.

All of these are feelings that they will never admit to their fantasy self.

As a result, they express no emotions at all. They are unable to speak about them. None of them.

How did you feel when you visited your brother's cemetery today? That's not good.

Going to prison at such a young age is devastating. What were your thoughts? I was disappointed to lose my girlfriend. Her name is still tattooed on me.

What do you think about my BPD diagnosis? That makes sense. You've always been emotional and insane.

What were your emotions like when your daughter won her pageant? She is exactly like me! It's quite thrilling!How do you feel about your father's hospitalization? Everyone around me seems to be walking on eggshells because I get frustrated with the duty of caring for my father.

What are your thoughts on the divorce? I'm an adult. I don't let my emotions influence my decision-making. But she's a jerk, and she cheated on me.

What are your feelings about your ex, whom you claim done all of these horrific things to you? What am I thinking? What am I thinking? Hmmmm…I'm not sure. I simply move on. What's the point of living?

THEY ARE UNABLE TO DISCUSS FEELINGS. THEY NEVER MENTION A REAL FEELING.

Only through a collapse can you see their true feelings. You'll witness them openly express all of their negative emotions, cry, and act like toddlers: this is the genuine self that the mask hides.

They are always aware of their sentiments of hatred and worthlessness, and they deal with them by projecting them via abuse. They seek out others to abuse in order to make them experience what they are feeling. They get relief when you absorb those sensations, like as jealously, wrath, or worthlessness, since they feel powerful and superior, which reinforces the narcissist dream.

Superiority and power are always egotistical fantasies: no one is better than anyone else.

Even power is a human fabrication, an illusion we all buy into to fatal results (as NPDs/ASPDs seek positions of authority).

Nobody has that kind of influence over anyone else. We accept the illusion, which allows abuse to grow.

That is why the great often fall, and all civilizations crumble.

That is why all systems of power were built on violence, intimidation, and thievery – authority comes from abuse, but it is always an unsustainable mirage.

And violence is not a statement of power: it is an expression of fear. It indicates that the narcissist or psychopath has LOST CONTROL.Their dreams are totally fuelled by something they are incapable of: love.

They couldn't even mistreat us if we didn't love them or have pity for humanity.

This means that power is constantly available.

And they are well aware of it. And I despise you for it.

THE QUESTION THEY CAN REPLY TO:

• WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ONE OF YOUR PARENTS?

The golden kid narcissist's name is named after the narcissistic parent. The narcissist can only think in binary terms — all good or all evil — and the golden child is born perfect and all good.

In the narcissist's world, only one person is all good and perfect: THEMSELVES.

They consider the golden child to be an extension of themselves, and can conceive of no better name for them than one that is strikingly similar to their own.

It is most usually Jrs, but it may also be mirrored names, such as Kandi Lee and Kathi Leigh. Alternatively, they use their first name as the child's middle name or share middle names.

They always eagerly respond to this question, sometimes proudly or shamefully.

They'll tell you whether your parent is a saint or the devil. They frequently go by a nickname, initials, even a middle name if they despise them.

(They can be cunning with this: they will occasionally use names with the same meaning or names that slant rhyme).

They have no notion this is a red flag.

I've never met a person named after a parent who didn't later demonstrate that they had NPD by their behavior.

Whenever a mass shooting occurs, I check up the shooters' complete names as well as the parents' full names.

I also use this method to gain understanding when a horrible crime occurs, such as the murder of Casey Marie Anthony's precious child, Caylee Marie Anthony, whose mother's name is Cindy Marie Anthony...

You can also use this method to determine whether celebrities you admire are narcissists. (There are a lot of them).

Now, how many US presidents, international leaders, and warmongers have been Jrs throughout history????

NEARLY ALL OF THEM.

No surprise, according to the report, world leaders are 250 times more likely than the general public to suffer from NPD.